Tonight, I feel like everything is just beyond my fingertips. A chain of hands, clasping hands, something solid and worthwhile, but I can't reach it.
I can't connect with the old, the internal setting isn't right, and to keep me sane, this ending cannot be a tragedy. While its a reminiscence it can't hurt me, but if the book closes on a tragedy, then it will be finished forever.
The new has me in its sights, I feel its breath on my cheek, but I cannot embrace it. All of those people who surround me, who seem to care, but I'm not ready to throw myself in to this hurricane.
The constant is shaking, and I cant be quite what it needs of me. I dig it up so it can trip me over, and I fall in to its familiar arms, to find them pushing me away even as I am drawn to it.
And at the centre of it all, is me. Steadfast, with no reason to lean, to fall in to any of these worlds, looking up for an answer. And all I see, is the tiny bait of your words, flickering, in the corner of my sight, an unknown taste, a tease and a warning sign, but when I look it straight in the face, it is beyond me, and I do not know if the climb is worth the likely fall.
XX
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